Boxes With Tools

Television is more interesting than people. If it were not, we would have people standing in the corners of our rooms. ~ Alan Corenck

I have a clear vision of what I am going to write about tonight.

Okay, you caught me. I HAD a clear idea about what I was going to write, then I sat down in front of the ol' keyboard and my mind said one word.

I of course told my mind that I had no desire to write about that, because come on, I'm a dude and dudes just don't write about those things. I mean really Mr Brain, what the heck were you thinking?

My mind liked to remind me that it is actually in control and if it wanted to, it could simply make me write whatever it wanted me to............................................................................. or nothing at all.

My mind doesn't play fair.

Ever.

I can always feed it junk, but it apparently it likes junk, so that won't work. Besides, feeding it junk makes my belly grow, and while my belly may be competing for largest belly in Illinois - a feat that my belly has a long, long way from ever even coming close, I might add. Jenni doesn't like that idea for my belly, neither do I.

My mind didn't want to mention my belly, just so you know.

Apparently many different body parts can control my hands. Here I thought I had something to do with it.

Ha!

*****

Just a quick aside - dudes (and dudette's) that ride the luge, are crazy fearless. Wow!

*****

My mind also doesn't like side notes. Silly mind doesn't seem to realize that the side notes are indeed a product of itself.

I like to mess with my mind that way. I also have managed to not write about what it wanted to, I'm so sneaky. Let me share with you that one word that Mr Brain wanted me to share with you all, and perhaps you will see what I mean about my lack of desire to discuss it. That word was ...

IKEA

Pass-Through

Tact is the ability to describe others as they see
themselves. ~ Abraham Lincoln

When the time is right, my mind will free itself. Until then you will have these few words to get by with.

A Poem, No Really

Indeed, history is nothing more than a tableau of crimes and misfortunes. ~ Voltaire

The day is over,

The night is near,

All I can think about

Is an ice-cold beer.

.

Care to join me?

Sleepy Sleepy Shake

If you don't know what to do, call the media and at least give the appearance of doing something. ~ David Peterson

Guess what woke me up this morning?

It had nothing to do with any bodily functions, especially in the waste production section - I'm good in that area, and I know that you wanted to know that.

Actually, it was an earthquake, although as my friends in California would say, "puh-lease, it didn't even break four on the Richter scale."

To which I would answer, "oh yes it did, those seismologists just didn't want us to have our four."

For the record, it was initially reported as a 4.3, only to be downgraded later to a 3.8.

To which I say, whatever. All I know is that at 4AM, I was awakened by a loud boom and a slight shaking sensation. I actually though that either something blew up (hence the boom), or that someone ran into either my house or a house on my block (that would be the boom and shake).

The lesson to be learned from all of this though is; there are now two things that will wake me up from a deep slumber.

An earthquake or a power outage.

That's right, crying babies, police pounding on my door, father in-law pounding on my door, puking kids, puking animals, falling trees, alarm clocks, farting (not that I would do that , just sayin') all have no affect and do not disturb my sleep.*

Nope, not this guy. It takes an earthquake or a power outage.

You always knew I was weird, right?

* I have slept through them all, every single one.

Ode (whatever!) to 900!

Haven't done this in a while, so I thought "why not?" So here are twenty-two words after celebrating 900! See below!

900!

We spend most of our time and energy in a kind of horizontal thinking. We move along the surface of things [but] there are times when we stop. We sit still. We lose ourselves in a pile of leaves or its memory. We listen and breezes from a whole other world begin to whisper. ~ James Carroll

That's right, I watched 300 three times.

No wait, I bowled three perfect games.

I just finished reading my nine hundredth book, okay that seems a little low to be honest. Although I did just finish my second book in less than a week. More on this later.

Maybe I'm remembering my SAT score. Oh wait, that's right, I never took the SAT and I know that the ACT doesn't go that high, unless you have a factor of thirty, or something like that.

Okay, the suspense must end, or y'all might leave before the cake is served.

Yes, I am serving cake, virtually, to everyone that reads this post today. We are celebrating lucky 900!

Wow! 900 posts. Where has the time gone, oh and the words that I have written. Definitely going down in the annals of blogging history for sure. Don't believe me, go ahead and check them all out.

Kind of intimidating, isn't it? I mean there is at least six or seven hundred words written down, total.

Okay, enough with the patting myself on the back, let's get down to some serious business. I have consulted my virtual friends on Plurk and they agree that if I listen to an unabridged version of a book, it can count as actually reading said book, so that means I just "read" a whole novel today.

How cool is that?

What was it? Glad you asked, it was book one of the Dark Tower by Stephen King. Only six more to go, and they are all on my iPod, which means I will more than likely finish the series by the middle of next week. I might have to rethink my goal of 24 books this year, especially since I'll have ten done, by the middle of month number two.

Oh, I'm still reading, so don't worry about that. In fact, I am well into Master and Commander and plan on having that done by the end of next week depending on how much time I get to read it.

Now all I have to do is get my review up, as I am now three behind. Oh and to help with following along, I will mark the audio books with an 'a' or something. I figure that is fair, right? Plus my reviews will not only focus on the story, but also the narration. Trust me, it makes a difference.

So there you have it. Post number 900. Yippie!!

Bet you can't wait to see what I have for 1000.

When All Else Fails

Make a list ...

So today, I shall select and share with you a list of 15 random songs on my iPod.

Exciting, I know. Ready? Then here goes ...

1. Tax Man - The Beatles
2. School's Out (Live in Birmingham) - Alice Cooper
3. When the Lights Go Down - Faith Hill
4. He Shall Feed His Flock Like A Shepherd, Alto and Soprano Air - Handel's Messiah
5. Don't Go - Yaz
6. Rhythm of the Blues - Mary Chapin Carpenter
7. Bear Band Serenade - Country Bear Jamboree
8. On Parole/The Bishop - Les Miserables
9. A Rather Blustery Day - Disney
10. Mystery Dance - Elvis Costello
11. Open the Eyes of my Heart - Praise Band
12. With A Few Good Friends - Carly Simon, Ben Taylor and Sally Taylor
13. Epilogue (Finale) - Les Miserables
14. Tell Me Why - Genesis
15. I Can Tell That We Are Gonna Be Friends - The White Stripes

There you go, and wasn't that exciting? What does it say about my musical tastes, well eclectic comes to mind and I imagine that if I went out another ten songs, you would see an even more diverse collection.

Or a lot more kid songs.

People who say they sleep like a baby usually don't have one. ~ Leo J Burke

* Stay tuned for tomorrow's post, it's number 900!