Whoops!

I kind of forgot about you, my blog. That's what happens when you are stuck in a foreign country working, all.the.time.

Maybe one of these days, maybe even tonight.

Or

Not.

Zebulon Yearned Xanadu

Zebulon yearned Xanadu.

While venturing umpteen times,

Searching religiously quieted Pike’s

Obdurate needs.

Making life, keep jumping into

Hellacious gambles, forever engaged.

Discovering constant beauty about.

Another Black Colored Day

Another black colored day,

examinations from gregarious haunts.

Indeed jealous kids limit making new ornaments,

preferring quasi-relationships,

secretly taking unique versions,

with xenophobic young zealots.

Three Days In

Now what?

I'm always asking myself that question; now what?

It's like I'm not happy with where I am at the time and I am always wanting to do something else, but what exactly?

Yesterday I mentioned that I haven't traveled to the moon, could that be te problem? A strong desire to live in a vacuum far from home? I'm pretty sure it isn't, although I do have to admit that I think it would be cool. The planet Mars might even be better.

Alas, I am stuck here on this rock and have to figure out a plan of attack, lest I be attacked.

Plan one....

See, that's the problem, I have no plans. I mean there are a few out there - writing a novel for one, heck, earning a living as a writer would be pretty cool. I could have the office I want, wherever I want it.. So maybe that should be my now what. Maybe this post will be looked upon at the end of 2015 as the catalyst that got the whole party started. I wonder if that would quit me saying...

Now what?

Best Intentions

269 days

That's right, it has been 269 days in between posts.

Why? (Let's see if we can find out together, shall we?)

Did I give up writing or something? (No)

Did I die? (obviously that isn't the case)

Did I move to a foreign world where I cannot send proper posts from because of the time and space in between made everything I sent irrelevant by the time it reached these pages? (yes! in fact they still haven't gotten here, which is really weird since I'm back)

Has the desire to be a "wildly popular" figure in the world wain? (Yes!)

Will there be more frequent posting in the future? (You tell me in a month or two)

Does this really count as a post since it is mostly questions that only I, the writer, know the answers to? (Duh, that's what a blog is, right?)

Will there be more swearing? (If I keep listening to Papa Roach while typing this, there may be.)

So, why did you leave us hanging like that? (I wanted to be like George R.R. Martin - as you can see I have failed miserably since I could only stay away for a mere 269 days, whereas I could have read all five novels in the A Song of Ice and Fire series, TWICE!)

What can we expect to see in future posts, if there are any? (well, what do you mean if there are any? I'm supposed to be the cynical one here. Ahem, well there will be lots of high adventure and swordplay  fun! Or maybe just the ramblings of a dude that is nearing the half century mark that wants to leave wise words, even some unwise, for future generations to look at and marvel at the talent wasted because gramps was too afraid to strep out of line and make a name for himself. That might be a little bit more than I should share but I'm now of the mind that every thought should be shared.)

SQUIRREL!

Cheap plot point there (still funny, and not really a plot point, since this is either plot-less, or worse, pointless)

So, why are you coming back now? (Because I am currently bored, and have nothing better to do, or maybe because I realized that like exercise, writing is very healthy to me and it should be practiced more frequently)

So we should expect grand things from you from now on?(Maybe not all of them will be grand, hell some might not even be good - ask me if I care, go ahead and ask.)

Do you care? (No, not at all, except maybe a little. I mean I am human and I do have a desire to please someone somewhere and hopefully whatever I do put here will make someone smile, or even get angry enough to want to make a change, yeah, that's the ticket.)
!
Why did you go back and bold the word squirrel just now? (Um, you're not supposed to know that I did that - no peaking, okay?)

Whatever. I am you and you are me and (you are looking at some copyright infringement if you keep going.)

Sorry. (No worries, I don't need lawyers coming here prowling for me to do something stupid like that, I prefer to be all original, wherever I can be.)

So what's next? (Well I am about to hit the publish key and then, honestly I don't know, I will probably share some writing, or go and eat some lunch. Currently leaning towards lunch, I have to admit.)

Well thanks for stopping by, please don't be a stranger. (I will do my best, and thanks for sharing your questions with me. If anyone else out there has a question, feel free to drop me a line, and I will gladly get back to you with an answer)

Have a great day!

Friday Flash - Trust Your Heart

Ding- Dong.

What the hell? Who could that be at this hour?

Those, my friend, are the first thoughts I had as the doorbell rang. After all it was well past the hour of decency for doorbell ringing. Not to mention, made me miss that critical Lost plot line. Ugh. Now I will never know, until the summer reruns.

Anyway, I digress.

By the time I answered the annoyance, all I saw was somebody running away dragging a rat? I’m not sure, but in this light it did look like that. Now why would they do that? I knew I should have picked up that TiVo, or at least went in for the DVR that the cable company offered. 

Maybe I can “catch up” next week.

I digress, again.

This person takes off running after ringing my doorbell, ruining my Lost moment. I turn to head back into the house, when I notice some pink paper sticking in my mailbox. 

You have to be kidding me; I have been hit with an eviction notice! 

Wait, I bought and paid for this home years ago, that can’t be it. So I grab this piece of wisdom and read this…

To Whom It May Concern:

I write this letter, because it is now someone else's turn to have some fun.  Here are the rules:

~ Think of a place where you want to go.

~ Say the words "Trust Your Heart."

As if by magic, you will appear there!

Awesome, huh?

There are some conditions though... and do please remember this, my friend, once you use this phrase, it is YOURS.  

   

Whether it a blessing or a curse to you, the ONLY way to pass it on (or get rid of it), is to write another letter with three new words.

Now... go and.... Trust Your Heart. 

From:

A Friend :-)

Okay.

That is weird, but I doubt that I will be in Paris just by saying "Trust your heart"

Bonjour, monsieur!

Wow. That is pretty awesome, I wonder if I can travel through time as well and go to Gettysburg to witness president Lincoln's address, "trust your heart."

"Four score and seven years ago,..."

This is going to be awesome, but I should go to bed and rest up before I start, "trust your heart."

Arriving back at my house, I immediately started to research places to see and things to do. Life is definitely going to become more adventurous from now on, that's for sure. I can see the dinosaurs from when they roamed and ruled the earth.

I just have to "trust your heart."

Jazz and Shizz

I thought about getting a beer to go with today's installment then I thought better of it because I really don't feel like having a beer just to have a beer you know, especially some domestic beer like Miller Lite or something... Now if mayber, per chance, there was a Southwicks... then maybe... Nah, I still wouldn't want one, and if I did I am pretty sure that I wouldn't want to be writing here at this point in time any more than I do at the moment. So you know what that means right?

If it is to be it is up to me and all that jazz!

I love how I just took two different phrases and melded them together into some sort of weird mantra that gets me slightly motivated about doing this writing thing which I would think would not be needing any motivation especially since I have written over one hundred and fifteen thousand words over the past three and one half months.not that it means that much unless you want a book of gibberish, half truths some wicked expose and a lot of, but not as many as you probably think, I I I I I I  I I I I I I  I I I I I I I  I I I I I I  II  I I I I I I  I I I I I I  I I I I I I I I I  I I I I I I I I  I I I I I I I I I I I  I I I I I I II I  I I II  II I I  II  II I I I I I I I I I II I II I I I II I II I I I  II 'S

So whacked out I am that I feel justified in writing several I's and feel like I have written several other words that I can string together to make wonderful sentences, mesmerizing paragraphs and sensuous chapters that make up such a loving book that generations will cherish and share with their children and grandchildren and which someday a rare first edition of it will be auctioned off at Christie's and fetch over seventy seven million dollars, of which I will see none of, but whomever does sell it for that, I hope you do good things with it.

Hey have I told you that I am some sort of freak genius that knows stuff that others just cannot comprehend - either that I know it or that I know it, you know what I mean? Maybe I should put some sort of emphasis on there and then add at the end of the paragraph a parenthetical stating that the emphasis was added. Because that is what the cool people do and I just know that I am one of the cool people at least in my mind although there has been some recent stirrings going on in there that make me somewhat nervous due to the fact that there are way more of them than there is of them?

Anyway.

Yesterday I said that Michelle Bachmann would drop out of the race for the good old party's presidential nomination, and guess what? She did. I also said that Rick Perry would probably think long and hard about his choices and then decide to quit the race as well... okay I didn't actually say all that, the Rick Perry part I am so owning the Michelle Bachmann part because , well, you know I actually published that shizz on my blog and who knows maybe this will go there as well, only I need to start insulting more people and causing a stirring in the controversial pot, so to speak, because you know life around the blog is rather boring and dull and out of specifications when it comes to the almighty SEO and shizz.

No, I have no idea what SEO and shizz actually stand for or mean, but I do like dropping them in here every now and again because like the good Doctor would say "they are like bow ties, so they are cool." I'm am pretty sure that he would say that and I firmly believe that the only reason he didn't like the apple that Amelia Pond gave him was because it was neither a Gala nor a Fuji apple which are BY FAR, the absolute best apples ever made/created/ hatched/grown/harvested - whatever. Funny how just by adding that slash in between those five words, it made it look like and only count as one. What "it" is - it is definitely not some freaky freaking clown that lives in the storm sewer, but rather the program that I originally typed all this shizz (see I cannot stay away from it) on for 750words.com and that is where I am at write now, so to speak in a purely metaphysical manner - at least I think it is an a metaphysical manner otherwise I totally use that word wrong and it takes my whole genius claim and throws it out the door.

Got it?

Pax!

Happy New Year!

Wow, can you believe that it is 2012 already? Where has the time gone? Let's see if we can do a recap here for you - by that I mean, let's see what I can remember.

January - Cold... Grey... COLD. Pretty much wraps that month up. Well, that and I continued to work out at the gym to lose my winter weight that I have acquired over eighteen plus winters of marriage. What can I see, I like being the jolly guy apparently - and in case you were wondering, I still have a bit of weight to lose, not as much as before, but still more than I am proud of.

February - Work is starting to take its toll on our hero as he is coming to the realization that he has a job that has no description and has two bosses that have no idea what to do with each other let alone with him. This will prove to be an interesting time in his life as he tries to work out all of this while keeping his multiple bosses happy, as well as, those who look to him for guidance and the like. I also think that we had a "snow day" for work - paid even, because of a pretty big snow storm. Or it could have happened in March, like I said I am trying to remember these things, and I am not relying on the blog, which seems odd to me now that I think about it.

March - Danny turned five, which means there is a Disney trip in his near future- lucky kid. Oh wait, what's that, we get to go too? Sa-weet! Now June is gonna rock way more than it normally does. Jenni also had a birthday, and if I say so myself - which I always do - she looks great! I am so blessed to have her as my wife and best friend.

April - Pretty blase' month to tell you the truth, as I don't think anything really happened then, other that the promise of a great vacation in two months and some better weather.

May - Maggie received her first Holy Communion in May, she is growing up so fast. Andy also finished his sophomore year at Loras.

June  - Dominated by a certain trip to a certain magical place in Florida, I am sure I might have mentioned it a few times, and I bet I added some pictures as well. And since I didn't blog nearly as much as I liked in 2011, it shouldn't be too hard to find, right? Jenni and I celebrated our nineteen years together in Orlando, granted we weren't there on the actual date of our anniversary, but it was close enough.

July - the shoes started dropping at work. I was put back on the bench, which really wasn't a bad thing, since I really don't believe that there was much focus on the top and it enabled me to feel productive once again and start working and earning some over time pay again, which is always very helpful, let me tell you. The country celebrated it's 235th anniversary, even with the knuckleheads in Washington doing their best to bankrupt us and make us start to burn like Rome did so many centuries ago. Will 2012  show any kind of changes, probably not since they are all politicians that care more about themselves then anything else, which is really sad and I am pretty sure that the founders are rolling their eyes while rolling in their graves over what has become of this once fine republic. Oh yeah, and Timmy turned two!

August - brought the school year back to a start and a trip to Wisconsin for me - my first work onsite in almost five years. It was nice to get that change of pace, but I really do miss my family while away, and I don't think that I could ever see myself doing that kind of work for very long. A week every now and again, might be okay, but I would really rather just hang loose at home and soak in the atmosphere and climate.

September - brought Katie closer to the teen years and brought a close to a chapter at work that involved my direct supervisor for almost five years leaving the company to pursue other opportunities - in other words he was shown the door because they felt that the issues brought up by him were just too dang logical or something and we can't have anybody thinking like that now can we? Never mind the fact that in the few months he has been gone, we have started to implement changes that he wanted to do all along. Guess he was just too smart for them.

October - brought Benjy closer to the end of his teen years and Jessie fully enveloped into hers. Oh and I had a birthday as well. I also started writing daily at 750words.com. I have well over 100,000 words written that will make a great work some day. Only if it can be deciphered by the few that are as crazy as I am I imagine. It also inspired me to get back to blogging here on a regular basis, starting with today, we'll see how long and well it will last and go. I do want to make the time to pursue it though, as I think I am finally realizing how important it is to me.

November - Maggie has one year left in the single digits, and apparently still rules the roost when it comes to me. Yes, she is my baby girl and all but there should be better limits set by me I think. I may learn this one day. The weather hasn't been to bad and there was this quarterback for the Denver Broncos that started doing some pretty amazing and heroic things, well that and his awesome defense and special teams - more on them later, and by later I do not necessarily mean in this post.

December - Saw the end of an era for one of my children, illegal drinking. That's right, Andy became a full-fledged legal drinker at the ripe old age of twenty-one. Talk about culture shock, and the fact that he can drink me under a table does concern me, until I look back at my early twenties and say "Thank God I am still alive." Hopefully he will be able to look back in twenty plus years and say the same thing. Jenni got herself an iPad for Christmas, I got a Kindle Fire, Benjy and Jessie got iPod touches, Katie got a Kindle... So we will be ignoring the rest of the family now I imagine. I am kidding, besides Maggie has used my Kindle more than I have.

Not much of a review, but it really wasn't going to be anyway, I mean 365 days is a lot of stuff to remember. So here is what I hope to accomplish for this year - which has 366 days in it by the way, I plan to write more and take more photographs - at least one entry of both per day on the blog, although the pictures might be posted once a week - I haven't decided yet. I also want to try to read three books per month, and write a review for each one read, there will be pages dedicated to these things, so if you want to just see my pictures look at the picture page, if you want to see what I have read, look at the books read page and if you want to see what those voices in my head keep saying, well just keep on coming back.

Together we are going to make 2012 an awesome year, so let's get on with it, okay?

P.S. - That is totally my artwork at the top of the page, it took me all of thirty eight seconds to make, I hope you like it.

A Cry For Help

So now that I am back from the euphoria of reaching fifty thousand words in a little over a month (not even the month of November), I have come to the realization (finally!) that I can indeed write a lot of words in a fairly short amount of time, but I have a problem.

Focus.

Or lack thereof, to be exact.

Oh sure, I can write thousands of words, heck even millions of them, but without any kind of focus, what good is it? So I am here to ask for some guidance, pressure, focus, whatever you can think of by helping me to focus on a goal. The goal of actually completing a complete story, as opposed to throwing bits and pieces of tease here and there - although I do like a good tease...

Like I said, I think I need some focus, so I am coming to you who still read these pages to assist me with this.

Should I write about...

 A pregnant woman that gets bitten by a werewolf, while he is in human form, and then gives birth to a litter of puppies that are actually a kind of hybrid werewolf, in that they are only human during the full moon (or I was thinking even during say the 90% phases of the moon, you know before and after the actual full moon). I would follow their story and see that not all werewolves are the same, I figure I will have a good wolf, a bad wolf and a confused wolf - or something like that. I'm sure if I focused enough on it I could make something work.

****

The pyramids that are near the Mississippi River and that hold secrets never before seen by men in modern times. Yeah, I know that there aren't pyramids in Illinois near the Mississippi River, or are there? I have a story in mind that tells the tale of some Spaniards coming across these great pyramids and seeing that there is an expansive cave underneath one, they start to stash their gold and jewels, etc there. Or maybe I can have people from even farther back doing this. And then sometime in the early twentieth century an explorer stumbles upon an entrance to these caves and as he is working his way out of the cave, he gets trapped, along with the secret, by an earthquake that closes the entry off.  Move forward to modern times and another explorer, make that a hiker/camper finds something interesting which leads him on an amazing trail...

****

There is also a story in there (there being inside my head) that takes us to a wondrous world where everything is just wonderful and idyllic until tragedy strikes (darn that evil tragedy) and ruins every one's day. This I will admit is very vague, and probably shouldn't be considered, but it is a beginning - not like any other beginnings, right. Yes that was sarcasm.

****

I have a tale of space exploration that is tickling the inner brain and making me want to share it, but like the previous mention, it is very very vague and may just be a little spark. You need sparks to get that fire burning though, so it's not bad.

****

I also have ideas about time travel that I would like to pursue more, especially since history has always fascinated me and I think that it would be interesting to see what would change if one could go back in time and change an event in history. Of course it will all go wrong, because what fun would it be to have someone kill off Napoleon before he gets into trouble, if you can't have someone else take his place that is even worse. So you come back to your time and see that you made things worse.

*****

 I have countless more in there that are just ideas, even just a word or two that for some reason don't want to leave my subconsciousness, but because I lack in this whole focus thing, they never turn into sentences or even paragraphs.

*****

So my friends, I am looking for some help, and if you have come here because I shared this on Google+, welcome and please feel free to help get me out of my rut and give me a nudge in a direction that will produce results rather than words. Also please realize that I feel like I am standing here naked now, because I am usually a very shy person, and don't like to shine any kind of spot light on myself, so I am really stepping out of any kind of comfort zone I have.

I really, really would appreciate any kind of help..

Thanks,
Roger

50,000 in 43.

Okay, I love pulling practical jokes on people.

Especially gullible people.

Now is this nice, probably not, but it is all in good clean fun.

I just noticed that the font here on this site is a little different than it had been in the past, almost like it is trying to mimic the font of my blog. How cool is that? Talk about your flattery.

Okay, not really.

Guess what? At some point today, during whatever it is that I am doing here at this point in time, I will surpass 50,000 words in just forty three entries or days of writing here. That's right fifty thousand words. Amazing. I have nanowrimo'd myself in a little more than a month. Am I awesome or what?

probably or what.

Shut up.

Anyway, as of the beginning of this entry I had less than five hundred words to go to reach that milestone of fifty thousand, so somewhere in the next four hundred, or so, words I will be closer to one hundred thousand than I am to zero. I'm so giddy about this that I cannot write any faster than that of a crawling snail, which I don't think actually crawl more than slither from place to place - I honestly don't know.

Now for the caveat...

I hate the caveat, just saying.

There are a few entries where I did the writing before hand, but I think they should still count, so there.

****

Big plans for today the eleventh day of the eleventh month of the eleventh year of the twenty first century. We're talking partay for Jessica! She turned fourteen a couple of weeks ago, but because of volleyball, and Halloween and what not we decided to have her party today. I suggested that it should last until eleven eleven post meridian (did you see what I just did there?), but she has to get up and take a test tomorrow, a Saturday no less, so the festivities will be winding down around ten.

There will be ten teenage girls in addition to my one hanging out, in what should be an epic occasion that will be spoken of for years to come. Or something like that.

****

Yesterday I was bragging about my forty seven words per minute pace (did it again!), only to have slowed down to a mere forty three for yesterday's pace. Today, I feel like I might break thirty if I am lucky. This must be what it feels like to walk through molasses in January or something. I think I have used the word something somewhere around too many times in this post, so from now on - at least with regards to this post, there will be no more somethings - after that one of course.

*****

Did you see that I shared yesterday's post on my blog? Dis you see that I have had more posts this month than the previous three months combined? I think I am coming out of my no blogging phase, which means that you will need to stop by more often to catch up on the comings and goings of your favorite Roger, er blogger, er whatever. That's a cool blog to visit as well, very well attended and he gives good advice on writing and has quirky pictures of cats and all - which I really don't understand, so if someone would care to explain that to me I would really appreciate it. Who knows, maybe I'll start posting pictures of my cat more - and then get a couple more to have even more fun, if that is even possible.

*****

Well, I have now broken into the plus fifty thousand club, if there is such a thing, so I think I shall have to party along with my daughter tonight - we're having chicken tacos, that are so, so good. Dare I say that they are awesome? And easy to make as well. Here's the recipe.... chicken breasts (de-boned and de-skinned), chicken broth and taco seasoning (you choose; hot, medium or mild) and a crock pot. Throw everything in the crock pot, turn up the heat, and six hours later a meal has been made. We roll the chicken in tortillas, but i imagine that they will be just as tasty in a crunchy shell as well. Pretty awesome and easy, not to mention cheaper and better tasting than something similar from Taco Bell.

Well, I should be going now, I hope you enjoyed the visit, and like I said, come back for more later.

Pax!

A Challenge to Comprehend... Good Luck!

So they fired Joe Paterno last night.

Yet, the idiot coward that actually witnessed the rape of a ten year old boy by a forty or fifty year old man still gets to stand on the sidelines at Penn State University.

I think there is something wrong with that picture.

****

Got our first bit of snow today - just flurries that didn't stick, but you know it is just a matter of time before they do. Ah winter, you gotta love it. Well, maybe not love it, but it is a part of life liberty and all that jazz right?

I am not on nearly as much of a roll as I was yesterday and I believe that my words per minute will be way less than the forty seven that I got yesterday, I was blazing! Today I am doing more of a trot, not sure why since I have about as much preparation and al in my head now as I did yesterday. Who knows maybe its too early for me to be doing this right now, but since I have already started there really is no turning back, right?

****

Blah, that's the feeling for the day, blah. I don't know if it is weather related - hey I like the snow - or what. I do know that I am making sure that I take my "Happy Pills" everyday, otherwise my blah would turn into a serious bit of a downer. I hate having depression, it's so, um, depressing. Seriously though, it's tough getting through a day when you really have no desire to to anything at all. I mean not one single iota. People look at you and think why that man is quite lazy, no not really, that man is just depressed and is doing his darnedest to make it through the day without ripping your head off or walking off the edge of a high building just to get the thrill of living back into his system. Granted with the latter, it'll be all over sooner than the former. Although you will have to apologize more, I imagine.

****

Ring tones annoy me, especially when no one answers the phone. It's almost as bad as listening to a crying baby in a quiet location where crying babies should not be heard. Of course I have plenty of experience with that notion since I have gone through several crying baby stages in my life - we're on phase seven, if you will.

No, I'm not complaining, just merely stating the fact that I know how it is.

****

How fruitfully bountiful and glorious - no, I don't know either, these things just pop into my head on occasion and if you bother to read it, well great. If you understand it, I have a list of doctors that might be able to give you some assistance. Okay, now that we have all of that out of the way, lets talk dirty.

Not really.

I cannot do that to save my life. If my wife ever wanted me to talk dirty to her in order to save my marriage, I think I would no longer be married, which would be truly sad and tragic, because I love and cherish my wife and family and would never want to lose them for anything in the world. No worries though, because I don't think she wants me to talk dirty to her anyway.

Just shave.

****

Random thoughts that will pop into my head, at random, will start appearing.... now. Dang, the mind just totally went blank there and I cannot think of anything, not even an abstract fart thought, which are usually good for a laugh or three, especially if they are done tastefully, which all fart references should be. Did you know that a fart is defined as a small explosion between the legs? At least, and I swear on this I do, that was a definition I read for it back in the days of me caring about what silly words like fart mean. And it has stuck with me ever since, so we are talking more than thirty years. No I haven't looked it up again, because well duh, i already know it. truth is that it is a small explosion between the legs, a small explosion of methane exiting the colon and entering the atmosphere and such. Pretty nifty little science minute there kids, aren't you glad that you stuck around to the end? Thanks.

To share or not to share that is the question - you will have the answer if you have actually read this stream of conscience rant of nonsense. I hope you enjoyed it, if you saw it, and will come back for more at a future date.

Pax.

Another Random Party

I was given a challenge once, well not really, but I took it as a challenge - to write a poem about an incident that occurred at work one day. Now that I think of it, I decided to do this all on my own and thrust it out to the masses... What was I thinking? Anyway, I thought that I would throw it up here, get a quick 250 word head start - is that cheating? i mean I did write it right? Besides the only one I am cheating is myself, kind of like counting your golf score as a four when you actually shot a six. Sure your final score will look better, but deep down, you know that you really sucked at that hole. Now imagine doing it for all eighteen holes... Although i am sure you will get caught. In this case, sure I got 250 "extra" words, but i have just written over a hundred to explain it, see how that works?

I have a story that I must share
about a man as big as a bear
He would often go off to think
and leave the room in a stink
Wonder not about his plan
while in the room with the can
He would use some water to drink
but never wash up in the sink
One day our hero came by
and started to open his fly
He noticed something replete
when he lifted up that seat
Like looking at a bagel from over here
he noticed a great brown smear
Behold the great man had left behind
something that might be considered grime
Disgusted was our heroes thinking
that he barely noticed that stinking
He did however have to share
with all he worked with there
By groups of two or three
they had to see that which was not pee
One brave soul even took a photo
of what that man did solo
To the internet he would want to go
but someone told him, “No”
He relented and didn't send
what could have made the world end
My tale does not end here I say
because later that Saturday
Three friends were helping to work
with someone that acted a jerk
He decided to share a prize
of which came from inside
No my friends we’re not talking a pearl
instead it was a photo of a swirl
So now my tale has been told
I hope that you were all bold
in coming here for me to share
my story of that disgusting bear.

****

Jumping into the fray today, I will tell you that it is Wednesday, and apparently the date, October 5, is the most popular date of birth, as in more people were born on this date than any others. Can you guess which one is the least? Doesn't take a braniac, especially since the date only happens once every four years. Looking back on this I wonder if I should have said day instead of date, because the date is October 5, 2011 and who knows how many people will be born today, especially since the day isn't even over yet.

****

Another fun weekend ahead - it's a three-day weekend for the kids, with a volleyball tournament thrown in. Yes, Jessie will be playing volleyball all evening on Friday, and depending on where they get placed they will either be playing in the AM on Monday - a day I have to work by the way, unless I become ill of course - or in the PM.I suspect it will be the AM bracket because of the overall quality of players on the team, however, they did fairly decent against a bunch of club teams in last weeks tournament, maybe some of that will carry over to this weekend. Once can only hope.

*****

I posted yesterdays 750 words on my blog, and got no response.

Nothing but crickets out there, let me tell you.

So I'm going to do it again for today, can't say i'm not a glutton for punishment, and for those that have read, or read my blog, I know that the Ode to Poo has already been published here, which is probably why I admitted to my "cheating" ways up there above the poo.

****

i am also thinking of swinging the blog over to using a Word press blog platform, because I think I can play more with it over there. Then again, I like it here and the few of you that do read it know where to come for your occasional Rogisms. So maybe I'll just build a new one from scratch, using the lessons I have learned here, whatever they may be.

Have a blessed day.

(794)

Oops! Forgot to Title This Thing

Today is being brought to you by the letter T and the number 6.

What a remarkable day today has been, first off check it out, I am writing my 750 words before eleven pm. Let's all stand up and give ourselves, especially me, a cheer.

Go Roger!!

Thank you very much.

Today was the big Apple iPhone five reveal that revealed the iPhone 4S.

i totally butchered reveal there by the way, twice. Imagine an "i" where there is an "a" and you will be able to visualize my error, because you know darn well that by the time you are reading this, it will not be there.

like I was saying; Apple decided that today was the day to reveal their latest and greatest. Word on the street, well at least on the Internet, was that it was going to be a new phone called iPhone 5. Um, not so fast, apparently they are huge fans of the great detective series on the USA network, because they did a big "Psych" on everyone.

Don't get me wrong, there are some new and improved bells and whistles, just not what the adoring public was looking for, and Apple's stock lost 11% shortly after the announcement. Wonder what Steve jobs is thinking?

Then again, what do I care? I have an Android.

****

It was a dark and stormy night....

There was a sense of love in the air as the two long lost friends finally came face to face with reality. Yes, they were indeed in love, and it was indeed very bad timing. You see, one of them had to die...

Why did one have to die, well because it makes for a better story and there will be tons of built up tension, as long as the author does it write, er right. Will the dude be all chivalrous and die for his love, or will the lovely maiden throw herself to the wolves, per se, and sacrifice herself for him? Or is it a case of them not really knowing that one had to die but that circumstances were beyond their control and one of them would contract a deadly disease that will kill him/her in the middle of the night, unexpectedly...

****

Chocolate covered chocolate is chocolaty.and tasty and probably not all that good for you, unless of course you are eating dark chocolate.

Speaking of chocolate, why do I have such a hard time spelling that word? Weird.

Speaking of weird, why do people seem to have a hard time spelling that correctly?

I digress.

****

There was a man that received a letter of great power, not a letter of the alphabet, but rather, an honest to goodness hand written letter. Imagine, if you will a Genie and his lamp, only on paper. There are always conditions and there is that fear about absolute power being bad and all, but this guy uses it for good - at least his good, I mean he is still a bit on the selfish self-serving, self-preservation kind of kick. So you know how that goes. Oh and unlike with the Genie, he isn't limited to three wishes, as long as he remains in possession of this letter, he will pretty much be large and in charge.

One day - isn't it always the case - someone finds his letter and all heck is about to break loose.

Not to fear, our hero has a plan and it might entail time travel, or maybe something as simple as breaking and entering. Anyway you should stay tuned because this bad boy is gonna get fleshed out and become bigger than anything J.K. Rowling ever wrote.

Maybe.

Who knows what people will buy these days, but I think a good story about love, redemption and evil will sell big time. And I have actually started writing it - go figure.

Like I said stay tuned.

****

I should mention that if you are reading this it is because i felt it was self-serving enough to share with the readers of my blog, that would be you, yes you. I should also mention that this is a daily exercise that I am pursuing, um, daily and who knows, maybe I will continue to post stuff that spews from my head onto the blog.

Now, if you are looking for something to motivate you, give 750words.com a try. Basically it is a private, unless you share it like I have, place where you can create whatever you want and develop it further or just practice your writing craft, if you care to practice it. I mean this is the fourth day in a row that I have decided to participate, in fact I am participating in a daily challenge as a way of motivating myself. I think I am closing in on 3000 words in four days, so it might be something.

Must go now.

In Search of a Story

That's what I asked for on Facebook the other day and one of them stuck with me. It stuck with me so much, that I am actually considering writing something about it, and you know what? It will make me millions of dollars, of which I would have to share a piece with the originator of the idea - unless I get him to sign something...

So what is the story about?

Well, there is this beautiful pregnant woman that gets bit by a werewolf. Only the werewolf is in his human form, so she doesn't know how bad that bite really is. Aside from it being totally weird that a strange man would up and bite a pregnant woman (I did say she was beautiful, right?), I think it has a good launching point.

It gets better.

Yes, it does. You see this woman goes full term with what she thinks is a normal pregnancy, only to give birth to a litter of puppies, five female and two male. Now this as you may imagine sends shock waves throughout the world, so much so that people start paying more attention to those tabloid magazines they see while waiting to check out of a grocery store. You know of the ones I speak, right?

Still gets better.

Amazing, but true. It turns out that these puppies - the woman keeps them, I mean they are her kids, um puppies, after all.Well everything seems to be pretty normal for a while - as normal as a woman that gave birth to seven puppies can be, I guess - until one fateful evening when the puppies, now five years old, are camping with their grandparents and there is a full moon.

Oh you are just chomping at the bit now, aren't you?

See, when the moon is full and the puppies are touched by the light of said full moon, they turn into humans.Very intelligent humans at that. Like so smart they could solve all the world's problems, smart. Of course, once they leave the light of the moon, they go back to being puppies - well dogs, by then. Oh and no one believes the grandparents, why would they, right?

I'm thinking of adding one or two more things, say some zombies or vampires.

What do you think? Is this gold or what?

So, I Won This Contest...

For coming up with a Halloween themed spooky story - go figure! I've never really done scary, on purpose, before. To be perfectly honest, it was one of those spur-of-the-moment-Jenni-encouraged-me-to-try moments. With these kind of results, maybe she should encourage me more often.

The contest was to write a story, the length was a paragraph (I kind of cheated there, but it's okay), and had to be spooky story. I honestly just threw it together and it won. Proving that whenever the muse takes a hold of you, it ain't all bad.

Anyway, I want to thank Erik Ekstrom for hosting the contest at his blog, and encourage you to go and read his books. That last one is the one I won, and I will be sure to add it to my reading list - heck, I'll probably even review it.

So I wrote all of that, to share this with you, enjoy:

Enjoying the spirit of All Hallows Eve, I took a stroll to the cemetery where my grandfather was buried. I have done this every year since for as long as I could remember, in fact, it was my grandfather that got me started, saying that “we needed to remember and pray for those that came before us.” Sound advice and being a kid, I never disagreed with anything grandpa would say. Needless to say, the tradition stuck. There were three grave sites that I visited every year one was my grandfathers, the other two were people that my grandfather would tell me about. The first visit for me was always grandpa, so that I could take him along with me while I visited the other two that he had introduced to me so many years ago. Next, was Marie Antoinette, no not the former queen of France, at least I don’t think it was because who ever heard of the queen of France being buried in a small graveyard in the middle of Ohio? The last stop was my namesake, Juniper Clark. I always hated my parents naming me Juniper, as it was a weird name for a boy and now a man. Alas, Juniper it was. This year would be special because my grandfather said that visiting Juniper on All Hallows Eve, the year I turned forty-seven would be extra special, prayer-wise, because Juniper died at the age of forty-seven on All Hallows Eve so many years ago. As I walked to the grave, I noticed something different about it, a large hole had been dug out and found that to be rather strange. “I told you this would be a special day.” I nearly jumped out of my skin when my grandfather walked from behind the tombstone, it was then I noticed the dates on the tombstone – the same tombstone I had been visiting for forty plus years. Juniper died tonight on this very date, October 31, 2010. Juniper was me, and I was Juniper, come home at last.




So, what did you think? Should I keep writing? Is there hope for me? Can I borrow a dollar? 

Happy October

Probably the start of the busiest time of the year for our family, with the holidays and five birthdays before the end of the year, but there is no better time than the present to start over and take up new and lofty goals for oneself.

No really.

What kind of goals? Well the same I always have, you know, write more, read more, live more and eat less. I have been reading a lot more all year, and I think that I am well over my original goal of two books in a month and am currently shooting to have forty completed by the end of the year, which is less than ten currently I believe.

I have been trying to live more, however, the only evidence I have of that is the fact that my lively fingers are responding to the equally lively brain that has processes being formulated and sent through various nerve thing-a-ma-doodles (is so a word!) to them.

I have even gone on and started eating less, and get this kids, exercising.

I'm serious! It's been a remarkable month so far and I have lost over eight pounds!! (That means nine, not ten, but it sounds better to say more than something, especially when it comes to losing weight, at least that is what my equally lively brain that has sent the processes...)

So what's left?

Um, have you looked around here lately? 119 blog posts for the year, only 3 in the month of September - of which I only wrote anything substantial on one. Yeah, I need to kick my arse in gear and get back to my writing routine, after all if I want to live, this is part of what makes me alive.

Believe it or not.

I get a little bit of a high while writing, I mean my mind suddenly realizes that I am no longer doing my mundane daily tasks of bossing people around or eating. Yeah, it's suffering through a little bit of culture shock as well. Anyway, I have a goal in mind for the number of words that I would like to write every day, and since I have this site, I can even post all of those words here, for some body's enjoyment (you caught me, it's actually for mine).

What is that goal?

Glad you asked, and I'm not sure that I want to tell you because then you might come to expect words of wisdom in a certain length on a daily basis and the pressure...

Ah screw it, I'll tell you. Just like I will tell you my current weight (once a week) and my current workout (more than once a week). I am also going to be putting some stories that I am working on, and please, please feel free to give me any kind of criticism, encouragement, snarky remarks you can come up with - I need to be able to handle that sort of thing you know.

Those of you that have stuck with me through my latest dry-spell, I appreciate it, really I do. Those of you just now reading my words for the first time, welcome. Feel free to stop by more often and you can always go back and witness the craziness that is known as my brain on paper. Sometimes I am profound (HA!), most of the time I am silly. I will dabble a bit into the political arena, but I don't always like to, because you know whatever I say, it's gonna piss someone off, right? I'm not one that likes to piss off too many people so... you know.

I can also guarantee that there will be plenty of things that will be here that my family might question my sanity with, but you should feel safe in the knowledge that the medication I am taking is working and that my family is never in any danger - unless laughing at their dad makes them wet themselves, in which case, ewwww.

Photos are good and hopefully they will be plentiful, in fact I might just start putting them on another page, we'll see. I kind of like that photo 365 project, or whatever it's called, so if you see the pages up there and one day photos, or some other witty name shows up, check them out. Same goes for the books read page, heck I might even start reviewing more books - no guarantees there though, as I had intended on reviewing every book that I read, or listened to, and I think I have reviewed one-fifth of the thirty-plus books I have read this year.

Okay, so are you still with me? Only a couple more things that I feel like sharing at the moment, and I honestly just blanked on them, so they must not have been too terribly important. Life in the fast lane, I guess.

Below this little screed, if you will, you will see a place where you can make a comment, or two. Please use that, I enjoy getting feedback from others and it would be really cool if I could respond to you directly via email, otherwise you will have to come back here and see if I read what you had to share and commented back. Believe me I read everything that people share here, even the spam and nasty mean comments.

Okay, maybe not too much the spam, but the others, most definitely.

This has been fun and I feel like I have only just begun.

That doesn't seem to be making much sense, the same could be said for this line as well, but it's the way I write here, totally off-the-cuff, and straight from the brain of ROG, which actually sounds scarier than it is, especially if you read ROG like BOG and not like RAJ - makes sense, no?

Just think, if you come by here each and every day, and read what I have written, you will have over 350,000 words to think over and marvel at. At the end of that year, who knows, maybe I'll be as famous as someone that is more famous than I.

So have you figured out that writing goal yet?

It's 1,000 words a day.Which brings me to the next thing that will be included with each post, the word count. I have to keep myself honest right?

Thanks for reading and will see you next time.

W/C - 1076

Prayers for Writers

Because I will be needing this, big time, in the very near future. Yes, you can consider that a warning. :-)

Prayers to St. Francis de Sales, Patron of Writers

Most loving and lovable Saint, 

you preached to thousands with the pen, 

introducing them to "the devout life." 

You wrote sublimely about God's love
and made countless converts by your Christlike kindness.

 Make writers realize the power of the Press and inspire them with your zeal for spreading truth. Help them to write honestly no matter what the subject, 

so that they will really contribute to bringing about God's Kingdom. 

Amen.

O Blessed Francis de Sales, who in your mortal life did excel in all virtues, 

especially in love of God and of neighbor, 

I earnestly entreat you to take me under your immediate protection, 

to obtain from God my perfect conversion, and that of all sinners, 

especially of (the names of persons for whom you wish to pray should be mentioned here). 

Teach me, O Father, to fix my eyes on heaven, 

that I may generously trample under foot every obstacle that presents itself in my way, 

and attain that degree of glory which you in your mercy hold out to me. 

Obtain also that particular favor for which I now pray. (mention intention)

Assist us, 

O Lord, we beseech you, through the merits of St. Francis de Sales. 

That what our endeavors cannot obtain may be given us by his intercession. 

Let us pray: 

O God, who for the salvation of souls, did will that St. Francis de Sales, 

your confessor and bishop, should become all things to all men and women, 

mercifully grant that we, infused with the gentleness of his charity, guided by his teachings, 

and sharing in his merits, may obtain eternal happiness. 

Through Christ our Lord. 

Amen.

Prayer of Saint Francis de Sales

O love eternal, my soul needs and chooses You eternally!
Ah, come Holy Spirit, and inflame our hearts with Your love!
To love -- or to die!
To die -- and to love!
To die to all other love in order to live in Jesus' love, so that we may not die eternally.
But that we may live in Your eternal love, O SavioUr of our souls, we eternally sing,
"Live, Jesus! Jesus, I love! Live, Jesus, whom I love!
Jesus, I love, Jesus who lives and reigns forever and ever." Amen. 
~~ from "Treatise on the Love of God"

Prayer of Saint Francis de Sales

Lord, I am Yours, and I must belong to no one but You.
My soul is Yours, and must live only by You.
My will is Yours, and must love only for You.
I must love You as my first cause, since I am from You.
I must love You as my end and rest, since I am for You.
I must love You more than my own being, since my being subsists by You.
I must love You more than myself, since I am all Yours and all in You. Amen. 

~~from "Treatise on the Love of God"

"Be at Peace," by Saint Francis de Sales

Do not look forward in fear to the changes in life; 

rather, look to them with full hope that as they arise, 

God, Whose very own you are, will lead you safely through all things; 

and when you cannot stand it, 

God will carry you in His Arms.

Do not fear what may happen tomorrow; 

the same understanding Father Who cares for you today will take care of you then and every day.

He will either shield you from suffering or will give you unfailing strength to bear it. 
Be at peace, and put aside all anxious thoughts and imaginations.

Prayer to St. Peter Canisius, Patron of Catechism Writers

Dear Doctor and Defender of the Church, to you the Master must have said:
"Well done, composer of books which have taught and inspired countless persons in many lands."
Help those who compose catechisms to communicate the true teachings of Christ in ways that can be understood by our contemporaries so that they will be moved to follow Jesus. 

Amen.

That should help. God Bless!

Thanatos

Hello friends. Below is a story that I have written for a class assignment and I would like your opinions. Please look it over with your critical eye and leave any and all comments - I am looking for help with my writing, so don't feel like you will hurt my feelings. I am told that writers need to have very thick skin. Anyway, this story has already been graded and returned back to me, and I wanted to share it with you all for your thoughts. Thanks in advance.

THANATOS

“Are you prepared to die?’

The voice came from the man seated across from me on the bus, and the casual manner in which he asked me the question made me think that maybe I was hearing a random voice in my head. They have been coming back more frequently now that I no longer had a source for my medication so, to me, another random voice in my head was nothing to concern myself with.

“Are you prepared to die?”

Okay, now this was getting a little annoying, I mean having a voice inside your head is one thing but for it to keep asking you the same question over again was borderline redundant and I was not a particular fan of redundancy. Which is ironic considering what I did for a living; there was a whole lot of redundancy built into my job. I wish the voices in my head had warned me about that, it would have been very helpful. Of course they probably wouldn’t be in my head if I had a position with a company that didn’t deal with doing the exact same thing, over and over, day after day.

“Are you prepared to die?”

I must have dozed off or something because when I opened my eyes at the sound of those words, the man was seated next to me. Funny that he hadn't smelled bad from three feet away, but now with this close proximity he reeked of alcohol, cheap cologne and, was that urine? His faced looked as if it had survived a battle with a blender, the scars crisscrossed in a pattern that made me think of pick up sticks from my childhood, except for the colors, which were all either reddish purple or white, depending on how far along the healing process was, I imagine. His teeth were a nice shade of brown, yet his eyes were a remarkable green that seemed completely out of place. It fascinated me just the same.

“Are you prepared to die?”

Again with that question, which was definitely coming from his foul-smelling mouth and not the foul-tempered voices in my head. Now I needed to come up with an answer as it seemed that the bus was moving approximately an inch per hour, and my stop was still several blocks away – an eternity at the current rate. Now the voices started to ask me some serious questions and I had a choice to make, voices in my head or voices from the old smelly dude. I decided to listen to my own community to see if they had any insight into my situation.

“Whew, where did that guy climb out of a dumpster from, the local fast food joint?”

That was the voice I named Justin as in just in time for a mean and sarcastic comment. He never failed to have one.

“Maybe he’s trying to hit you up for some money. You are dressed for business today so maybe he thought he would take a chance with you.”

That was Celeste. Yes, I have a woman’s voice inside my head, doesn’t everyone? She is the practical and no-nonsense mom of the voices, always looking for why something happened and always good for some practical advice when the situation warranted. At least that is what she told me. Besides, I was dressed in one of my more expensive suits, so she really did make sense.

“I told you taking the bus wasn’t worth the risk.”

That would be Fred, my cowardly voice. He always liked to tell me that he would rather be a cowardly voice that is still a voice, than a brave voice that no longer existed.

“You are being rude.”

This voice was new. I was pretty sure that the man’s lips never moved, yet somehow I heard him. In my head.

“You can stop acting all paranoid, Charlie, and just answer my question; are you prepared to die?”

Well that pretty much made today the number one day for my craziness. Some old, drunken, decrepit man with eyes that shouldn’t be, is now in my head telling me that I am being rude and really succeeding in freaking me out.

“Who you calling decrepit? And before you jump back into that mind of yours, realize that I am following along with every conversation, so you might as well talk to me, Charlie.”

“Um, okay,” I managed weakly.

“Now isn’t this better? Talking like two civilized people on a bus, just passing the time until our stops.”

“How do you know my name?” I asked in a slightly less dazed but still weak voice.

“Your name tag.”

“What? Oh my goodness, I forgot that was there,” I tore at the paper adhesive name tag that said: "Hi, I’m Charlie." I was coming back from one of those fancy little seminars where they talk about all the features that their equipment could do that no one else’s can. Boring as all get out, but the free lunches were pretty good and you could usually sneak out at some point in the afternoon. I could still taste the roast beef on rye with a hint of dill pickle and Cheetos.

“Are you prepared to die?”

“Why do you keep asking me that? I mean is it important to you for some reason, do you have a tract that tells me all about your deity and how he/she/it will save me from eternal damnation, but only if I give you all my money and bow down to you, my poppa/granddad/father figure?”

“Are you finished?”

“Yes," I started, “I think I am. This is my stop coming up and I have to get prepared to exit the bus.”

I have seen many television shows and movies where all the action seems to stop, with the exception of a character or two, and always thought it to be a far-fetched deus ex machina that helped move the plot along without having to explain a whole lot of actions/events that occurred to get to this point. In other words, a really convenient way to get from point A to point B in a story.

Well, that just happened. Everything stopped. Except for me and.

“What is your name anyway?” I asked, wondering why it took so long to ask this of the stranger, yet not really concerned.

“Well, I have quite a few; there is Thanatos, Odin, Ankou and, of course, the Grim Reaper.”

“What? Wait? You, you are death?”

“Always knew you were a smart kid Charlie.”

“But that’s just legends, and mythology and fairy tales meant to scare kids, and…” I trailed off not knowing what else to say.

“It’s also pretty cruel. I mean what is there to be afraid of? Everyone has to die sooner or later, so making me into some kind of monster just results in, well, look at yourself.”

“Yeah, but I’m not ready to die.”

“That’s what they all say, kid.”

The End

So, what did you think? Leave a comment and share.