I Wonder What I Should Title This?

There are two ways to pass a hurdle: leaping over or plowing through... There needs to be a monster truck option. - Jeph Jacgues

So have you heard? My company got sold.

Well, actually, acquired, whatever that means.

It means that we will now have to deal with six months to a year of aggravation, segregation, alienation, procrastination, and any other 'nation' you can think of.

Will we still have our jobs?

Will we be relocating to another site?

Will I still be able to spend that month in Malta?

Okay, that last one isn't real, just checking to see if you are paying attention. Anyway, my $55 million company got "acquired" by a $39 million company that we were told, fairly recently, was going bankrupt and out of business because of the way they are being run. To top that off, the president of the acquiring company will be in charge of the us acquiree's. (I know that isn't a word, thankyouverymuch Mr. spell check).

Makes sense so far, right? Now get this...

The current president of our company, who just two months ago told us about the "evils and bad company management" of the acquiring company, now tells me to put all that information into a file, and shred it.

What the (expletive deleted)?

Seriously, does he think that we are all that STUPID?

Apparently, some of us are, because they all had Kool-Aid stains all over their shirts.

Don't get me wrong, I am all for the merger, because we are actually being bought by a much larger ($12 Billion) company, with lots of opportunities. What I don't like is how it appears that we are being "sold down the river" by these rich people getting richer at the expense of us non-rich people.

Oh yeah, I may be conservative, but it doesn't mean I am all for everything corporate. Nor, for that matter (notice my tangent...) am I a racist because I don't like how the president is selling our country down the river, by saying "(expletive deleted) Constitution, who needs this (expletive deleted) old piece of paper anyway?" Um, it's what made you president moron.

Back to my original rant...

Where was I? Oh yeah, the merger. So, we have a question and answer session, where I did bring up the issue above - the look on the CEO's face was priceless since he knew that I knew it was him bad mouthing the new guys. Benefits of a small company. I should point out that our company president and CEO are one and the same, in case I confused anyone. He was brought in to make the company "sell-able" and did his job, it's what he is good at.

The questions that were asked got answered, sort of, because you know they can't tell us "everything." What fun would that be.

By the way, on a completely different subject... ROLL TIDE! (currently they are winning 24-6 with 5:34 left in the third).

Round 2?

Yes, believe it or not, the saga continues...

Actually, this is more like a round two and three, because yesterday, I had the pleasure of sitting through listening to both of these mopes as they complained about "GOB did this" and "Fnewgy did that." I mean seriously gentlemen, you are both approaching 60, not 12.

Round three though was a little more out of the blue. I mean if round two was just full of jabs and body cuts, then round three was a one-sided round of upper cuts, but no knockdowns. Here's what happened.

I get to work and get settled in for my morning routine of reading emails, assigning work, etc. GOB was already there, because he wanted to work early and leave early. During the summer we allow that, to help out with morale and let people start their weekends early.

I digress.

Anyway, Wannabe (he's a former Marine reservist, who we all kid about being a wannabe Marine - all in good fun.) was showing me a decade resistor that had crack in one of the panels, this rendering it defective and not up to our standards. (Boring, I know, but important as you will soon see). The only way that we can repair this would be to replace it with another panel from a decade resistor that has similar resistance settings. (Are you sleeping yet?) I help Wannabe and he goes back to his bench, and then I hear that Wannabe and GOB are joking back and forth about GOB blowing it up and all that blah, blah, blah background noise that I hear but don't really pay attention to during the day.

Unbeknownst to me Fnewgy showed up and went about his normal routine - whatever that is. All of a sudden I hear yelling. (hence the CAPS)

"THAT'S THE KIND OF CRAP I'M TALKING ABOUT GOB! YOU KNOW DARN WELL WHAT YOU ARE SAYING AND YOU BETTER STOP IT OR I WILL BE GOING TO HR!! AND YOU HEARD IT ROGER MILLER*** THAT'S THE CRAP I'M TALKING ABOUT!!!!"

***First off, what's with using my whole name? Am I in some sort of trouble, MOM!***

I replied "I honestly didn't hear anything until you started to raise your voice. But I'm sure it's not worth yelling screaming about. Sheesh! I'm trying to get some work done here."

If I could do this differently, I would have told Fnewgy to start his vacation early, but I didn't, so I deserve what happened next.

Things calmed down, a bit, and the rhythm of the lab was coming back to a more normal state. There is something else I generally do first thing in the morning, and I was on my way to accomplish that, when GOB tells me to get out here right now.

Uh, sure.

He then proceeded to explain how that kind of Barbara Streisand should not be allowed, to which I agreed and apologized for, because a) I really should have handled it differently (but in my defense, I really didn't see it coming), b) I really had to accomplish my next mission, and pretty quick to, so I had to clear the room.

I'm a very private person after all.

The rest of the day was fairly tame, GOB did call J, so J had to call and find out what was up, and then he talked to GOB.

Fnewgy left for the day, actually for the next week, so things should be okay again. Until J decides that he wants to mix things up. Actually, I kind of want to have GOB work a 3 -midnight shift, along with OTW (Over Time (word for world's oldest profession that is illegal except for in Nevada)). Maybe I'd be able to kill a couple birds with one nicely thrown stone a) it would diffuse GOB and Fnewgy's rising tension and b) it might ease the cost of running the lab. I'll let you know how that works out.

One final note, I had to ask GOB if he knew what he was saying (for the record, he apparently said - as part of the give and take with Wannabe - something along the lines of "I'm going to sue you.") and he kind of smiled, but then said no he wasn't trying to get under Fnewgy's skin, and that it was just an opportune time for Fnewgy to be tuning in to their conversation.

Maybe I did the right thing after all.

In This Corner...

We have M - the Good Ol Boy (GOB), from Alabama, or is it South Carolina? It depends on which state is in his favor at the time, I guess. Actually, he grew up in Alabama, but lived in South Carolina for a long period of time, so he is comfortable with either. A little history, GOB is an alcoholic with a bad temper, he got busted for DUI a couple of years ago, and hasn't had a drink since. He actually abandoned his job a couple of years ago, we hired him back because he is a good worker and everyone deserves a second chance. He is also quite conservative, loud, dyslexic, and has a problem with pronouncing some words.

His crime: Upsetting Fnewgy (F-ing New Guy), with a reference of "Your boy Obama" and "Obama lover" (the last of which was actually said to me in a private conversation and not directed to Fnewgy, and it was actually directed towards "Obama lovers.")

Over in the other corner we have R - Fnewgy, also can be referred to as PITA, and Super Arrogant Ass, for this narration, we will call him Fnewgy, because the narrator likes this name, a lot. Fnewgy was hired on by us approximately nine months ago, within two weeks he pretty much alienated everyone. EVERYONE. He sent a note complaining about being call "new guy" by everyone, because well, he was the new guy. It had nothing to do with his skills, or anything other than the fact that he was the new guy. A friend of ours actually gave us the term Fnewgy, and it has stuck. He has sent, a minimum of, three letters to HR regarding some petty little thing like being called "new guy" or being asked to help the team out in areas other than his primary area, but he refused because he wasn't trained. It was to help out in shipping and receiving, not the assembly of rockets. He also refused to do some repairs on certain test equipment because he "doesn't get paid enough" to do that, which is funny because when he was complaining about being called the "new guy" he claimed that he could run circles around everyone in the lab with his knowledge base. Finally he felt that he was being harassed by GOB with all of the Obama references.

Enough background? Not yet. GOB is former Army and Navy (yep, he was crazy enough to join two branches of the military), Fnewgy was, uh, Coast Guard. Both men are in their fifties, with Fnewgy being older than GOB. Fnewgy also has a temper and has on many different occasions been known to get a little loud when trying to make a point, and he feels that former president GW Bush ruined his life and made him lose over a quarter a million dollars. I'm thinking hyperbole on that last point.

On to the Main Event...

It all started with this email sent on Monday:

Subject: Political personal attacks

GOB

I am sick and tired of your attacks on me Political personal attacks will no longer be tolerated. I heard your remark to Roger (yep that's me) about the "Obama Lover". Not to mention Friday's "Your Boy Obama" comment.

If you make even one more such attack I will make such a stink with HR that you may NOT survive. I am sure (My Company) does not want a law suite over your attacks. I am just the person to do it!

KNOCK IT OFF!!!!

If Roger(me again) and J(my boss) cannot get you to stop I'll get HR to do it.

Notice I did not send this to HR. This time!

Fnewgy

As you can see, Fnewgy was mad. Hence the red ink. No his email wasn't in red ink, sheesh. Just trying to lighten the tension around here.

So J decided that a meeting today would be necessary to calm the situation down. It was scheduled to start at eleven, but after he and I discussed it for a little bit, he figured why not start it now, at 9:15.

No Problem.

"GOB, Fnewgy, into J's office now. We're moving up our meeting."

At this point I am stalling, well actually talking to several other members of my team about a variety of things; one wanted to know if I needed anything from the gas station (no), another needed some paperwork corrected (done), a third wanted to discuss the weather (put that one on hold), and finally someone wanted to talk about some test equipment that could not be found (gonna have to wait on that as well). This whole time Fnewgy is waiting, and steaming. I have no idea why, I mean he did write the email. I told him that I would be right there, as nature had to make a call. Lots of green tea does that to a bladder.

I find Fnewgy waiting outside of J's office. Apparently he didn't want me to miss a thing. I should thank him someday.

A paraphrase:

We opened the door and Fnewgy starts yelling right away:

"I am pissed off right now about all these personal political attacks that are being blah, blah, blah" (I had to blah, blah, blah it because I almost busted out laughing, I mean it was surreal watching this man that is old enough to be my father, yelling at another man that could be my uncle.)

J says "Whoa, no need to get all excited. Let's be calm and rational her." I have to give him credit for a) not cracking up and b) actually calming Fnewgy down. J then laid out the ground rules (quiet discussion, no yelling, etc) and then gave the floor to Fnewgy.

"I am sick and blah, blah, blah, Political personal attacks, blah, blah, blah, my team of litigators (wow, he has a team of litigators? threatening, no?) will bring a lawsuit against you GOB for $1 million (oh yes he did), and J and My Company, and will settle for $250,000 and GOB being out of a job."

Sorry again for the paraphrasing, but I did hit the high points.

GOB started by saying "I want to apologize if I offended you in any way..."

"Your apology isn't worth spit." (oh yes he did)

Remember, way up there, how I mention a certain GOB and his temper? Yeah, I was shocked that I wasn't witnessing an ass-kicking, as well.

Notice that GOB allowed Fnewgy the chance to get everything off of his chest, whereas Fnewgy immediately shot down GOB's apology? Yep, I'm probably thinking the same thing as you all reading this, why oh why, is he still with us? Must be his team of litigators - WTF? Maybe that's what he lost all his money on, eh?

In the end, they both agreed to disagree, with Fnewgy stating that he doesn't hold any grudges (but has a team of litigators), whereas the GOB was honest and said that he did. (Another smirk on my part - I couldn't help myself).

J and I had so much fun, that we treated the lab to lunch.

I'll fill in any blanks that I think will make me, and you, laugh if I think of more. As for now, James Bond is on, so...

The Natives Are Restless

Well Fnewgy is any way.

I think that's how I spell it. It's a name for our newest employee that has stuck. Imagine FNG, with no swearing.

Anyway, this guy has been a problem since day twelve. I guess he just had to work himself up into a lather, or something like that.

First he didn't like us calling him the new guy, because he has over twenty years of experience and I am NOT a NEW guy!!!!

Seriously. I was shocked, I mean did he not realize that he was the newest employee, hence the new guy? Sure we were joking (key word here, and he new we were joking) about him having to buy donuts every Friday for the first four weeks he worked there. Everyone else has done it, and had fun with it. Not Fnewgy, nope he writes a letter to HR to complain.

Next, he was offended that we even dared to ask him to help out in other areas of the shop. He'd reply that he wasn't trained in shipping and receiving. My goodness, it's opening and packing boxes, not rocket science.

Then he was mad that he was getting $6 an hour less than someone he felt had inferior skills. I would be too, but again, it was a joke, and in his little hissy fit, he pretty much told everyone that he was one of the higher paid employees.

Next, he said that he didn't know how to do repairs on the oscilloscopes. This from the same guy that said he had more experience and know-how than anyone else in the lab. We actually hired him to do repairs, and pointed that out to him. We had a private meeting where he came thisclose to admitting that he didn't get paid enough to do anything above and beyond what he was currently doing. I still assign him oscilloscope work, even repairs, and guess what? He does know how to do them. He probably thinks we will reward him for such a stellar job of doing his job. Can't wait to see his face when that doesn't pan out. He'll probably bring up the fact that his wife gets paid more than he does. (she's had the same job at the same company for over twenty years, she probably even deserves it).

There is plenty more to fill in some of the gaps along the way, but it might start sounding like gossip. Okay, too late for that, but I have to share his latest tirade from today.

We are all former military men in our lab. We are all pretty much conservative as well. He was in the Coast Guard and thinks that GWBush ruined his business. Yeah, because the President of the United States has time to do that. Anyway, chit chat happens, and apparently Fnewgy thinks that he is being personally attacked. He has even threatened to take it all the way to HR and make this one guy (a good ol boy from South Carolina, or is it Alabama?) pay with his job. He said our company wouldn't survive the "law suite" (his spelling, not mine) that he would bring upon the company, blah, blah, blah.

I have three words for him.

Just Shut Up!!

The good ol boy feels that he and Fnewgy should meet up in the parking lot - I talked him out of that, but I won't always be around, so Fnewgy better be careful. Although I am sure that he would have his 'team of lawyers' lying in wait.

And to think I thought I left the children at home.

Better Title Needed

I'm thinking that a future career for me should be as a consultant.

Seriously.

We are in the midst of a visit from a couple of consultants that are in town to tell us how to do our jobs better. These are a couple of gentlemen that happened to work for Toyota, and because of the "Toyota Standard" for streamlining and making work more LEAN, they are now experts in everything, as far as concerning time-cutting, cost-cutting, ribbon-cutting measures. Okay that last one isn't included, but I bet they could convince our CEO that it is necessary.

Again, I am serious.

Funny thing about Toyota. They make cars. Funny thing about my company. We don't.

Pardon my cynicism here, but how the heck are you going to tell me how to improve my job, when you don't even know what my job is. At least I'll be in Dubuque tomorrow, with Andy, going through the college orientation thing.

I'm hoping that Jenni doesn't go into labor, but she just might.

Finally, way to go USA soccer! Beating the number one team in the world, Spain, 2-0. Simply awesome!

News To Sleep On (probably not)

Oh my, this world is a strange place. I mean we have a guy that beheaded someone on a bus, claiming self-defense/schizophrenia caused him to do it, and the judge agreed...


Vince Li has been found not criminally responsible for the unprovoked killing and beheading of fellow passenger Timothy McLean on a Greyhound bus last summer.

Manitoba Court of Queen's Bench Judge John Scurfield said Thursday that Li, 40, could not be found guilty of murder and is not criminally responsible for the crime because he was mentally ill at the time of the killing.

"These grotesque acts are appalling... but are suggestive of a mental disorder," the judge said.
"He did not appreciate the act he committed was wrong."

Li had pleaded not guilty to a charge of second-degree murder. Psychiatric evidence at his trial suggested he is a schizophrenic who suffered a major psychotic episode last July 30 when he fatally stabbed McLean, 22, ate some of the body parts, and cut off McLean's head.

WOW! What will Canada do next?

President Obama's 'tracking poll' has taken another hit...

Investors retreated from Wall Street again, driven by worries about the nation's big banks and General Motors Corp.

Stocks slid to their lowest levels in more than 12 years Thursday, more than wiping out the previous session's rally. Investors wrestled with relentless uncertainty about the financial system and fresh concerns about GM. Short selling -- bets that stocks will fall -- ahead of the government's Friday employment report exacerbated the losses, slashing 281 points from the Dow Jones industrial and sending all the major indexes down more than 4 percent.

Stocks fell in every industry, with beleaguered banks posting some of the steepest drops. Citigroup Inc., still shaky despite receiving billions in government aid, at times sank below $1 and finished down 9.7 percent at $1.02. GM, meanwhile, ended with a loss of 15 percent at $1.86 as it warned of possible bankruptcy.

"Citigroup going below a buck today was a little scary," said Mark LeStrange, director of sales at Source Trading.

"To say that we're cheap here and it's a good value, it sounds right, but in all reality we could go 50 percent lower," he said. "Nobody has any idea how low we can go."

The Standard & Poor's 500 index is now down 56.4 percent from its peak in October 2007, making it the second worst slide for the index since its plunge of 86.2 percent from 1929-32.

Oy! Good thing I have at least twenty more years to retire. On the bright side, there be some bargains out there.

Now For Something Completely Different

Benjy is mad at their new baseball game for the Wii. Apparently his runner didn't run when he told him to run, and the runner then proceeded to get caught in a pickle and now he's mad because his outfielders can't catch easy fly balls.

A question for those that have made it this far. What is the best way for me to respond to your comments? In the comment box, or via email? I never know, plus I forget that when I am responding via email, to put your actual email address in. I think I'm going to lean more towards what Jeff does, over at his blog View from the Cloud, and start responding via the comment box. If that's okay. It seems to work well for him.

Finally, please keep Bill K, Mike D, and Bob P in your prayers - they all had their positions eliminated today.

God Bless and good night!

Let's Talk LOST

Did you see tonight's episode?

All I can do is say that I think I am correct.

Correct about what Roger? Glad you asked.

I am of the opinion that the LOST gang is actually turning into a grand paradox, and the past Losties will be hunting the future Losties, and at the end of it all. John Locke will wake up and tell his wife about this wild dream that he just had. Oh, hi wife will be Eloise Hawking and his son Sawyer will come in with the grandkids Kate and Jack.

Or something like that. :)

Back to the real world... The boss told me yesterday after 6PM, to make sure that certain individuals were going to be in the office on Thursday. Gee, and if they ask me why, am I supposed to tell them that their services are no longer required as well?

I didn't do it, but I know that they will all be there. Tomorrow will not be a good day I'm afraid.

With that thought, I'm going to try to make you smile.

Some guy bought a new fridge for his house. To get rid of his old fridge, he put it in his front yard and hung a sign on it saying: 'Free to good home. You want it, you take it.' For three days the fridge sat there without even one person looking twice at it. He eventually decided that people were too un-trusting of this deal. 

It looked too good to be true, so he changed the sign to read: 'Fridge for sale $50.' 

The next day someone stole it!

Want another one? Okay.

* One day I was walking down the beach with some friends when someone shouted....'Look at that dead bird!' Someone looked up at the sky and said...'where?'

Okay, that will do for now. Have a great day/evening!

God Bless!!

How Do They Do It?

We got some news today. News that we have been expecting, yet hoping to never come. However, as the flow of equipment slows down, you figure that it was inevitable and the message finally came clear.

We're going to have to tighten our belts a little, and make every dollar count. We will have to stick together and not give anyone a chance to tear us apart. Yes, it's true that some of us will have to leave, but it is for the better. They aren't happy here anyway, which doesn't make it any easier, but why suffer the disgruntled attitudes of the few, when the many know how to suck it up and make do with what we have been given.

I really don't feel good right now, and I hope that the four will be able to get back on their feet again. My thoughts and prayers go out with them, now if I can only get up the courage to tell them.

This sucks. Period. How do people do this for a living and live with themselves. I know that I couldn't.

Too bad I have to.

Any and all prayers would be appreciated, God Bless,

Some Mondays Are Better Than Others

I want to share something with you all, and I want to ask your opinion about it. We have a new employee working for us - we'll call him Bob. My boss is enamored with his resume, but has yet to really see him in action. I have no problems with Bob and he seemed to be doing okay. I cam into work this morning to this...

From: Bob
Sent: Saturday, November 15, 2008 2:51 PM
To: Roger ; Jeff
Cc: Dale
Subject: 'New Guy Remarks' Harassment!

New Guy Remarks


After three weeks of putting up with ‘New Guy’ remarks I am about sick of them. For the first day or two they were funny. But after three weeks the humor is long gone. I will not buy four-dozen donuts and one being chocolate Boston cream, for the shop. I have not had a pay check in two years and cannot afford donuts. This remark has been made at least eight times by many people in the past three weeks.

Not to mention the many other new guy cracks that float around the shop. To me this is similar to hazing at a college or boot camp. You can pull that on the young kids fresh out of the service, they do not know any better.

The cracks about the XXX on-site are disrespectful to the customer. I do not mind going on-site to XXX. You cannot come up with an on-site worst then any I have seen. I have been on at least a thousand on-sites. Some places had dirt and or wood floors.

I have 25 years of experience in the field of metrology both repairing and calibrating instruments that most of these techs have no clue on how to calibrate, much less repair. So I am NOT a NEW GUY and stop the remarks! It will piss me off sooner then later.

If the remarks do not stop I will file a formal complaint with Human Resources.

**** Okay, I guess he isn't so happy, hmm.

Let me tell you the cast of characters here... Bob is Mr. Unhappy, Roger is me, Jeff is my boss, and Dale? Well she is HR. Oh and XXX is a customer, that is totally innocent in all of this. So it looks to me like he has already filed a formal complaint. Oh, and when I talked to Dale's boss, Michele, she already knew about this. Oh, and she wanted to see what my response would be, after I figured that out. For the record, she thinks Bob needs to get a sense of humor, okay I guess it was technically off the record, but you know what I mean.

So how does one respond to someone that feels he is greater than everyone else? Well, this is what I did...

From: Roger
Sent: Monday, November 17, 2008 10:53 AM
To: Bob; Jeffery
Cc: Dale ; Michele
Subject: RE: 'New Guy Remarks' Harassment!

Bob,

Thank you for expressing your concerns regarding the "new guy" comments. I have spoken to everyone in the lab regarding this and they will no longer use that phrase when addressing you. I will say that there was no intent for malice and it (the new guy comments) refers to you being the new guy to the laboratory, and not about your ability. We have some very talented technicians and a strong calibration team that works together to get things done, and in getting things done we like to break up the monotony with a little bit of joking around. Our technicians come from a varied background and most have had formal PMEL training, they also have experience ranging from six years to nearly fifty years, so technically no one is a "new guy" in this lab.

The donut remarks were said in jest and you know that as I even told you that myself, in person. When you mentioned the fact that you haven't had a paycheck in more than two years, I again reiterated that it's all in fun, and that we joke that the "new guy" has to bring donuts on Fridays. We do this, because you never know, someone might take it seriously and actually bring them in. I apologize if I didn't make myself clear on the fact that you did not have to bring donuts in, and since you didn't, I figured that you understood this.

The remarks about XXX are all internal and should not be repeated to the customer and are just complaints, almost like complaining about the weather - facts, and there is nothing you can do about it. We have had several different customers that we do onsites for that offer their own sets of challenges, and we all have ways of dealing with them; yet we still do the job as trained and experienced professionals, if we didn't we would not be working here.

Jeff should be back on Wednesday, and if you would like, we can set up an appointment to discuss this further, face to face.

Roger


*** There you have it. Too much? Not enough? I'm just curious what you all think.

As for the lab, well they are not exactly happy that this "new guy" has decided to go whining to HR about some general ribbing. Methinks that Bob is really not going to like it there anymore, and I would not be surprised if he was no longer there when I get back from Disney. Or maybe that's just wishful thinking. PITA rears it's ugly head once again, and soclose to vacation. Dammit!

Thanks for reading my "dirty laundry" and have a great evening.

This is my tiny voice speaking...

It is tiny because there is only fourteen minutes left in the day and there is absolutely no way I can write anything that is in a Big Voice right now.

After all the kids are sleeping and I wouldn't want them to be scared awake, because as we all know, scared kids don't like to go back to sleep.

With all that being said, by my tiny voice, I shall leave you for another day - maybe even scheduling a post. (To answer Elizabeth's query, I have no idea what I would use it for, other than it's pretty cool.)

Off to bed, I've got early Mass(6:30), work (have to check and see if the migration actually worked - which would be good for my Twitter's, because the new network will allow me to Twitter (for now)), and last but definitely not least... Kitchen Floor.

Oh yeah, I must blog as well.

Nighty-night all, and God Bless!!

A View From Roger's Brain

3:30 AM - Wakey, wakey Roger.

3:40 AM - I said wakey wakey, you need to get ready for your big road trip.

3:50 AM - Dude, I KNOW that you don't want to go, but it is your job and you are needed to be there... ZZZZzzzzzz.

4:20 AM - Whoa. What happened? I must have dozed off there. Now you NEED to get up!

4:30 AM - Can you make the water a little bit hotter, please?

4:45 AM - Who the heck is texting you at this hour? Must be Jeff... Oh look, he's here to pick you up, and early.

4:46 AM - How the heck do the kids type on these small keypads anyway... Stupid 8 button doesn't work very well, now does it?

Okay, now it's ten and my brain doesn't remember what it was thinking past the fact that it was a complete WASTE OF TIME!! Seven hour drive for a twelve minute wait in the lobby, followed by another seven minute wait for all the parties to get there, followed by ten minutes of actual work?

Oh well, I get paid by the hour at least. :)

I need to work on this voices thing, I think. At least I'll have a month of practice.

Maybe.

A Trip To Turtle Lake... With The Boss.

Yes folks that what the month of May will be starting out for me.

Can I get a Woo-Hoo?

Woo-Hoo.

Thank you very much. Now, I am sure that there will plenty of stories to tell on this extravaganza that begins at five in the morning tomorrow.

First up is the six to seven hour drive to Turtle Lake, Wisconsin (sorry, didn't mention that part yet).

Next will be a really boring hour of how the customer is so pleased to have us servicing their equipment, blah, blah, blah...

Then comes the three to four hour drive back south to Madison, Wisconsin. This is where i will sit in my hotel room and try to get some sleep (can't do it without my honey, and I am not substituting her with my boss).

Then we get up and leave for Kenosha, by seven I would imagine. Where we will get to spend another hour of our lives listening to how great we are, how great the Packers will be - even without number four, more blah blahs and we're out of there.

Now, normally I would go back to the office - which by the way will be a shambles because we are doing a computer network migration and, well.... I will not be doing that this day, because I will take advantage of being able to come home and work on my %#&&@* kitchen floor.

More from the road, only I will be doing it in different voices...

Somebody Has To Be Pulling My Leg

To Whom It May Concern:



What the H-E- Double Hockey Sticks is going on around here?



My entire house and everything I own, or at least it seems that way, is breaking.



Now, we don't do laundry like The Philosopher-Mom Kalynne (Happy 20th anniversary, by the way!). However, we do do(hee hee) a fair amount. Okay, I know, I know, Mom does most all of it. Anyway, with six - seven if you count me- kids, our washing machine and dryer get quite the workout. The agitator stopped agitating for a little while (not good), but it does seem to be working, at least until magical Leek week. :) It needs to be replaced, and will be by year's end. I just hope that it lasts until then.



So what are you complaining about there Mr. Mylhibug?



I'm getting there.



Next thing we know, our oven doesn't work. Now, thankfully my in-laws were in the process of re-doing the kitchen and letting their oven go. While we were at Disney World last year, the range was moved into our garage. (Don't go there about our trip to Disney being in September... I have deaf ears to that... just ask Jenni).

You just know that there will be pictures at some point, due to the fact that I just Love do it yourself projects. Which began yesterday, and will continue through Benjy's high school graduation (I kid) - I think.

The dishwasher quit working, last week. I was able to fix that! (Yea Me!)

Bathroom faucet - Kaput! Again, I fixed it - in three hours. You know they make it look so easy on the packaging.

Trampoline - A hole/rip in it. Can you believe that?

Car - Leaky gas line, new car in line, once they find the title.

Teeth - Don't really want to go there, I'll just say that I am a good example of BAD dental hygiene.

Which brings me back to the oven. I was able to get the old oven out, without blowing up the house. Our oven was one of those 'double ovens' which is kind of a misnomer, since the bottom half was just a broiler and not usable for making chocolate chip cookies, cakes, etc. The new oven is a range (I guess) that has an oven and a stove top, so that means (naturally) I need to replace the cabinet, which then leads to the floor, which needs to be replaced due to the water damage from a leaky dishwasher, which means....

I'm NOT giving up on my DISNEY DREAM, darn it!!

Anyway, Mr./Ms. Whom it may concern, thanks for the good times to come... no, really, I mean it. I promise.

Have a nice Spring...

ME

My Seventh Heaven (okay it's just another list)

I, like many other young entrepreneurial types, have had many jobs throughout my life. The toughest and BEST job ever has been being a father - no joke, I love it and would not change it for anything. So, in honor of my thinking about jobs and this being the month of lists, what else would you expect? (I am going to need serious help for the rest of the month, I think...)

Here goes...

JOBS I'VE HAD

1. Babysitter - with two younger brothers, this was inevitable, and a pain in the butt at times. Especially when that lad who had a birthday two days ago, comes at me with a butcher knife, a broom, a sword and a kitchen sink. Okay the last two are false, but it seemed to me that if it wasn't tied down, it was in the air in my direction. It's no wonder I'm a little skittish. :)

2. Newspaper carrier - I have had this job on and off for some twenty years, okay most of that time was off, but still... When I first started I would walk the route (duh, I was 11), and I would collect money and even set out flyer's for new subscribers. My parents made me do this because I really, really wanted flying lessons. One thing my mind did know was this. Getting paid $50 a month, minus $65 a flying lesson, meant very few flying lessons. :)

3. Dishwasher - I actually enjoyed this job (wonder where my sick mind comes from, this may be a clue), except for the broiled on cheese (it was at a Mexican restaurant), that you needed a chisel, almost, to clean the plate with.

4. Birthday coordinator/game room operator/ cashier at Chuck E. Cheese Pizza - Now THIS was a fun job. Some days I would dress up like a clown and host birthday parties, or dress up in the Jasper T. Jowles costume and head out to a busy street to flag down business. Unfortunately, they closed down due to a bankruptcy.

5. Bagger at the commissary on base - I only did this a couple of days, the pay was really bad, unless you got a lot of tips. The adults doing it always beat us kids out when it came to the good tippers. Even though they had a fair system that equalized customers, and in theory, tips. Whatever.

6. Weekend janitor at the NCO club in San Antonio, Texas - Part of when my momma was displeased with my laziness (she yelled at me and told me to get a job, go to college, or join the Air Force), I got a job at the NCO club doing janitorial work on the weekends. Wasn't too bad of a gig, to be honest, and it paid better than my next job in the

7. United States Air Force - I am a trained and certified Precision Measurement Equipment Laboratory Specialist. I always joke about the USAF being the "country club" branch of the military, that being said, PMEL (my job) was considered the "country club" of the Air Force. Yeah, I can't really complain now can I?

8. Stocker at Sam's Club - worked here to help pay for the car mentioned previously. Enough said about that.

9. Some sort of manufacturing job, where it was oily and dirty and I went through three pairs of shoes, jeans and countless old concert t-shirts. Needed something to tide me over when I first got out of the Air Force and moved to the Chicago land area. At least my mother in-law got some new carpeting out of it. :)

10. QA inspector for In Flight Phone Corporation - This job was so laid back it was ridiculous, we would do nothing all day, literally nothing, and then at 4PM we need you to work overtime. Uh, okay. So I would get paid for twelve hours of work, and only work four tops. Guess civilian life won't be so bad, after all.

11. Calibration technician - What I was trained for in the Air Force. Not too bad, towards the end of my time there, I was traveling all the time. So I missed a lot of Benjy's growing up, at least between the ages of 6-10 months.

12. Metrologist - A fancier word for number 11, paid more too. AND, it was for a pharmaceutical company, with lots of research money. Great parties and outings. Heck, even their meetings were a big deal.

13 - 15. Worked as a newspaper carrier, cashier/stocker at a White Hen (now 7-eleven) and more newspaper carrying.

16. Usher/Cashier at a movie theater - FTB was due and it is always nice to have a little extra cash around, plus there were the benefits of free popcorn, drinks and movies. I was the oldest person working there, but it was mindless fun. One of the girls that I helped train is now one of the managers there. Pretty cool.

17. Phone Guy - This was by far the coolest job, I had a company car and pretty much free reign on my working hours. Sure there were some late nights, as Jenni can attest, but the pay was not bad. Heck I could even deal with the union, although I was amazed at how little my fellow members would think for themselves. Too bad. Then I got laid off. . . that sucked.

18. Calibration technician again - I came back to the same place as #11, watched the company get sold off, worried about the job, and got promoted. Not too many complaints - okay, maybe a few. :)

19, Which should actually be 17 but I am too lazy to cut and edit and, well you know just laziness. Sorry. Ice Cream Parlor, dishing out 31 flavors. Cool job. Did I mention there was FREE ice cream as well?

That's it in a nutshell, a rather large nutshell, and I am sure that I missed a couple somewhere, but I either just forgot them , or they weren't very memorable. :)

Good Night and God Bless!

Teenaged Angst and Blood

The joy of teenagers!

One minute they are all smiles and happy and helpful.

The next, spawns of the Devil!

What the heck gives? I mean we have gone through all of this before with LHS. Now, it's Benjy's turn. Testing the limits of his mother and myself. I am trying to not do the same mistakes that I made with LHS. But, you know, sometimes you just want to smack them around a little bit.

Next up... three teenaged girls. (Lord give me the strength...)

On a completely different subject, Manic and her blood drive were a resounding success! 33 donors - that's 99 lives saved by one little blog in the great big blog universe. If anyone read about it here and went on to donate, thanks! I wish I had half the traffic Manic did to have made it a bigger splash in the world of blood donations. Don't forget, even though the blood drive is over, there is still a need for more so go and visit a blood center near you.

The weather got extra chilly again, lest we forget that it is still winter. Just thought I would mention it. :-)

Tomorrow should be an interesting day at work. Not one, but two, performance reviews. In fact, I need to come up with a performance plan for one person. I have most of it done, so I will start off the day with that.

Yea! I can hardly wait.

Good Night.

I Love My Job, i love my job...

What fun it is to be here and have to deal with the "Big Guy's" edicts, that he sends out while he is on vacation.

The man is one that is lacking in some serious intestinal fortitude, and leading me closer and closer to that ultimate decision. Do I need this crap, or what?

I have taken more abuse from angry employees today about some silly little letter, that I wrote under his direction, about overtime. Funny thing is, I can see both sides of the coin here. The ones that are complaining the most, are the ones that he feels are abusing it. Whereas the others could care less. Interesting. Maybe he has a point. Only time will tell I guess.

Diving home last night was fun, in fact it was a breeze. I was surprised at how nice the drive home was. Nothing like the peaceful sound of snow crunching under your tires, to the beat of some ancient and mysterious tune. What fun.

This morning. Whole different story. Morons to the left of me, and to the right! You would think that people that live here would know how to drive on the fluffy, well cruchy and slippery, white stuff. It's not even the first snow fall of the season. Oh well.

Did I mention that I Love My Job?

Oh What a Day!!

I love days like this. They tend to challenge you as a human being and make you realize how lucky you really are.

Unfortunately, they also show that there are flaws in people and places that you would never expect.

Alas! I just love that word, and I'm not even sure what it means. I think.

It was Freaking' COLD this morning! Now normally I don't bitch and whine about the cold. Living here sixteen years I have found that there is always a week in January where the temperatures drop to places I would rather not see.

That was last week.

Yesterday it was near 50. This morning -5. That is nearly 55 degrees of difference in about 18 hours. Yikes!! No shorts today.

Of course there were no shorts today - it's a day of work and the frivolity that entails. Today, it was mostly work. Little Miss E. asked if she was getting fired on Friday. All I said was I don't know. That is being as honest as I can be. I know that the 'big guy' wants to let her go but, with him, you never know. Another mostly work item was/is the end of billing for the month.

Ugh, not much today, at least for now. Have to head home for 'family time!'

My Boss Is...

A big fat wimpy boy.

Why?

I'll tell you why. We have an employee here that has consistently been tardy, at least once every two weeks, missed three days because there car was "stolen" and they didn't have any PTO (Paid Time Off) left. Misused the company credit card, not once but three times, (yes I did say three and I am not exaggerating here). Shown up to work in a state other than one being ready to work another four times, that I know of (they have done on site trips where I cannot be a witness, and I took some vacation last year) Then there is the case of having all of their work checked, as opposed to, the 7% rate that everyone else is on. The several occasions that equipment has been shipped to a customer with the wrong paperwork.

Aaarrrrggghhh!!

The only thing that our customers see is the paperwork, so it is kind of important. This person has known that from day one, yet continues to be lacking in any sense of attention to detail. It's just very frustrating and I had to vent, so there... my steam has been released and I will be all the better for it. I think.

Back to your regularly scheduled whatever. :-)

Tax Time!!

Yep, and it is all over and done for me now. Which, of course, means that I must be getting a refund. :-)

Mr. Tax man, send me a dream (preferably in CASH). Now it would be nice if it were enough to pay for a vacation somewhere warm, alas poor Bug, it is not so. I think I can buy a case or two of beer though, and Jenni can get some of her fancy drinks as well. Maybe we'll make ourselves a new tax deduction.... You never know what God has in store.

Had fun at work. Yep, even on a Saturday. I only wish that people would realize (the people in this instance being the admin staff), that I get a lot of work done on Saturday's, while getting paid a premium, and I don't really want to be bothered with the normal day-to-day things.

I mean just because I know and have the answers, doesn't mean that I want to be asked, or tell you about it. :-)

I really am a teddy bear at work, and just like to talk tough. I think.

Came home to a night without television. What a beautiful thing. We are practicing for Lent, when we give up the "Boob Tube" for an entire six weeks. And we don't "cheat" on Sundays.

Okay new things on the blog for you to witness, look at, or just ignore. Both new items are courtesy of Philosopher-Mom, so if they really annoy you, go and tell her. She'll love both you and me for it.

The first thing is Blog rush, after they approve me of course. Which, it looks like they might have, because there is content in there. I put my category as aspiring writer, but I think this blog may lean more toward the personal diary category. Oh well, I think I can change it later, if I choose to.

The other is site meter, so I can see how many people aren't coming here. I know that Kalynne got a visitor from France. Which is cool, especially if you can speak French. I took French in ninth grade, oh about 25 years ago. Unfortunately, I can only say/read a couple of phrases so... if you are visiting from France and would like to teach me, then we'll have some fun!

Speaking of France, I too had a visitor from there. She gave me a hard time for my short post from a couple of days ago. So, now I have to make sure that I have long posts. Do they have to be interesting? :-) I can go through the process of calibrating a torque wrench if you'd like, but I would probably fall asleep before I finished, so I think I will stick to talking about me and my family. Oh and we can't forget the weather, the Denver Broncos, the Catholic Church, the...

Did I mention that my taxes are done?

I am as happy as these little people! I don't have to wait for any W-2s. or any 1099-int, -R, -whatever!

Okay, I think that I have been here long enough tonight. Besides there is laundry to be processed, and money to be spent. (Mrs. Bug and I have to figure out which brand of beer to purchase, and whether or not to go with the 'Top Shelf' good stuff this year.)

Have a great evening!

Oh, What a Day!

The alarm goes off at 4:17am.

I completely, totally, unconditionally hate that alarm! I also ignore it.

At 5:20am the REAL alarm goes off!

"Roger, Wake Up!"

Nnnn. I dnn wnnannana

"Just Get Up!"

Okakskk - or something like that! I don't really recall. I was still asleep.

Shower, skip shave, skip the other (that will come in time, believe me), get dressed and open the door to the frigid land of Chicago! Okay, technically not Chicago, but who the heck knows where Batavia is? Plus, it's actually colder here than by the lake.

But cold is cold, right?

Start the car, on the first attempt no less. Good car. :-) I thank my car every time it starts, I like to keep it happy.

Work, scratch that, PITA begins...

To summarize, woman no one likes comes back after two months of malin..., err injury/disability time, meeting to control every one Else's temper, frozen lift gate, cranky boss, inept employees, sick employees, quarterly waste of time meeting, no OT announcement, boss leaves, I look like a deer in headlights, go home.

Enjoy dinner with the family. First time in while. It was great, except that Benjy was a tad bit upset about #6 hitting the back key while he was uploading something for Maple Story. No more ski trip for Benjy. Too bad, because I was looking forward to going.

Off to RE. That would be Religious Education for those of you not in the know. Eighth grade plus Benjy. Benjy is taking seventh and eighth grade religious ed so he can get confirmed this year. We have a First Holy Communion and a Confirmation this year. Anyway, my neighbor asked me to teach her class for her (she had tickets for the Bulls game). Actually she asked my wife if I could teach, knowing that I love teaching! So off I go to teach the eighth graders about God, actually we were talking about Mary and the Communion of Saints. Was I nervous? Naw, I probably knew most of these kids anyway. Okay, that wasn't true but I still wasn't nervous. I have twenty-odd people that work for me, and I teach thirteen kindergartners Sunday School every week, what is there to be nervous about?

Nada. Zip. Nyet. Nothing.

That's right. Sure it started off a little slowly, but when Mr. Bug gets on a roll, there is just no stopping him. I believe that the kids not only had fun, but even learned a thing or two.

Next up, Girl Scout Cookies....

I am a sucker that is born every minute. I am also the 'Cookie Dad,' and have been for the past three - or is it four years, and I had to prepare the sheets for cookies. I dread this part because the forms are in triplicate and I tend to always make, at least, one mistake. I also have to add up all the cookies ordered, and then make sure I am ordering enough cases of cookies. Then there are the rewards, and figuring out what the girls wanted. It usually takes me about an hour to get through it all. Next month, it's pestering the parents to come and pick up the cookies, then pay for them. Why I choose to do this is unclear, actually the only, I repeat ONLY reason I am doing it this year is because Jenni is the troop leader.

That is it. No other reason. I don't even like the cookies anymore. (Okay, small lie there, I do like them, sorta, kinda a lot)

So, I am dreading the ordering, and guess what? They made it super easy this year! Yes, the Girl Scouts have finally found out how to set up a Spreadsheet!

Way to go, Idaho! (obligatory Toy Story reference)

No reason why I wrote that, it just popped into my head. Scary.

Anyway, it took all of ten minutes! I am so done! NO MORE COOKIE DAD FOR ME!
Plus Jenni isn't going to be the leader next year, and... that's it!

Day over, next stop, my bed and a 2:30am wake up. The Lord needs company, even if it is ten below!

God Bless!